Wednesday, May 21, 2014

S.W.A.G.: She Exudes Self-Control

Here we are, at the last fruit of the spirit we as godly wives are to exude, or ooze out. Not just as wives, but also in every area of our lives, we are to become like Jesus, oozing and dripping love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and now, self-control. (Gal.5) You will find links to each at the bottom of this post.

A self-controlled woman is one who keeps her desires, emotions and actions in check.

She is not easily swayed by her wants and desires because, practicing self-control, she has the ability to discern wisely what her flesh wants and what she really needs.

She is not blinded by her emotions knowing feelings aren't always reliable. Rather, she addresses a situation with a clear mind, focusing on truth from God's infallible word.

She keeps her actions in check, not participating in raucous laughter, giddiness, unwise counsel, gossip and the like.

Sometimes to understand what something is, we must look at what it is not.

Self-control is not:
self-centeredness, self-fulfilling,
self-government, self-important,
self righteousness,
self-ish, self-made,
self-reliant, self-destructive,

Self control is, however,
sufficiency without self-reliance, (Pr.21:17,27)
assurance without self-centeredness, (Pr.31:25)
confidence without self-glorification, (Pr.31:29-30)
self-esteem without being self-made,
self-sacrifice without self-destruction

A self-controlled wife is one who is confident and decisive without being demanding. She is level-headed, grounded and composed.

She prepares her mind for action (1Peter1:13) not letting herself become complacent, knowing the enemy dwells there.

"Be self-controlled and alert.
Your enemy, the devil,
prowls around like a roaring lion
looking for someone to devour."
~1 Peter 5:8~

A wife not alert or aware of the way her self controlled demeanor affects her marriage and her home, leaves an invitation for the enemy in blazing red that says,

"park your destruction here."

How so? Because she is the heart of the home, a vital moral force to her family. With her self-controlled mind she will be present minded, and task oriented. Practicing self-control through her actions will minister louder to her loved ones than her words.

be clear minded and self-controlled
so that you can pray."
~1 Peter 4:7~

Wives everywhere, do we not hear the call to live self-controlled, self-disciplined lives, being thought up, prayed up, planned up, fully grounded in our faith in Jesus Christ?

Today, adorn yourself with self-control, gracing yourself and your husband, bringing him good and not evil all the days of your life. (Pr. 31:11)

"A wife of noble character
is her husbands crown,
but a disgraceful wife is like
decay to his bones."
~Proverbs 12:4~

"A gracious woman retaineth honor"
~Proverbs 11:16~


Take a virtual coffee break for your homemaker's heart! Visit the top right side bar and join today!

You might also like these characteristics of  a woman with godly swag.....
She Exudes Love
She Exudes Joy

She Exudes Peace

She Exudes Patience
She Exudes Kindness


  1. So so true. I lost my cool the other day and realized how much it effects my children. How can we teach them self-control if we don't model it ourselves! Great reminders! I'd love if you linked up at my link up going on right now

    1. Hi Krista! Thank you for the gracious invitation to your link-up! How awesome of you! And yes, can't expect from others what we don't display ourselves. Very true! Blessings!

  2. I'm currently doing a study of laziness on my blog, and it struck me reading your post how much all of these characteristics relate. I never would have combined the idea of idleness (or lack thereof) with the idea of self-control, but your statement "She prepares her mind for action (1Peter1:13) not letting herself become complacent, knowing the enemy dwells there" does a great job showing how they are related. I am more than thankful for grace as I daily try to let the Holy Spirit change my heart and cultivate all of these traits in me!

    1. Hi Allyson! So glad you could relate! To Him the glory! Blessings

  3. Thanks for this! This is great! Visiting today from Holley's blog!

    1. Thank you for stopping by! Have a blessed day!

  4. Awesome post! Yes, I want to ooze self-control and look like Jesus!

  5. What a great post dear Kaylene! Yes we women are the heart of our home and we are model to those around us. Self- control is an area in my life that I am dealing with and as I draw nearer to Him and surrender my all to Him, He helps me through it. Stopping by from EveryDay Jesus. Blessings to you xxx

    1. He is with us every step of the way! I have to work hard on self-control every day. Blessings!

  6. Hi Kaylene! Stopping by from Fellowship Fridays @ Christian Mommy Blogger - I SO loved this! "SWAG" - God's word is always timeless isn't it? Whether we call it "SWAG" or "having it all together" or any other trendy word, the living God helps us to meet the needs of those we are called to serve. Amen!

    1. Amen! He is so good! Glad you enjoyed this! To Him the glory! Be blessed, dear sister in Christ!

  7. Such a very important reminder, Kaylene. I am not going to lie, self-control is one of the hardest fruits for me to deal with, at least when it comes to food (and sometimes emotions.) Lots of praying going on in this wife corner! Thanks again for sharing this truth over at #EverydayJesus. Blessings!

    1. Hi, Sharita! I join you in my prayerful wife corner! All through Him!

  8. Hello, I will say I have a NO TRESPASSING sign on my heart and mind! And It is written in Red...
    Thanks for Linking up on the party this last week!
    I hope you are having a wonderful weekend and good food and family!
    Blessings, Roxy xo

    1. I like that! NO TRESPASSING sign on my heart & mind! :) in red! :) Have a blessed weekend!

  9. I struggle to maintain self control at times. I continually have to bring myself before the Throne of Grace, asking for His forgiveness and welcome His leading. Thanks for linking up with The Weekend Brew!

    1. His Grace....His beautiful unending grace. ♥ Thank you for reading Barbie! Be blessed, dear sister in Christ!

  10. Self control. I couldn't work at it. I couldn't obtain it. I couldn't even do it myself. Not until I placed "self" on the altar and yielded my heart completely did I find it. Dying to self is self-control.

    1. Amen!! Dying to self is self-control. And there His grace floods my soul. Not by ourselves, but a gift from Him. Thank you for reading, Chris! Blessings!

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  12. So much wisdom in this series you've been doing. I have really enjoyed and I am so glad you've shared with TWW. Always sorry it takes me a while to stop by. Please know I am grateful for your faithfulness in being a part of the TWW family and I always enjoy visiting. :)

    1. Thank you, Beth! Your faithful reading & engagement bless me tremendously! I smile every time I see you've been here! Blessings

  13. Thank you so much for sharing your wisdom at Make A Difference Mondays #MADMlinkup! We appreciate you!