Monday, October 20, 2014

A Fierce Wife Unafraid to Stand by Her Man

Update: after being contacted with numerous accusations of advocating abuse, please know this was not my intention with this post. Please know, this and all my marriage encouragment writings come from once broken and desperate heart. God does miraculous things through our most pained times. Abuse is not everyone's story, but if it is yours, please click here for help or call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).

A fierce wife.

I'm not talking about an angry, contentious, intimidating wife.

I'm talking about a wife who has a strong passion for what is right. Have you ever heard of fierce loyalty?

That's what I mean.

So, now I wonder, have you ever been made feel wrong for standing by your man?

All because you chose to take God literally when He says to do as His word says and then acted on the full conviction you got from His Holy Spirit?

If so, then you, dear woman, are precious to His heart.

When It would have been ten times easier to end your marriage, or curl up in a little ball of defeat, or feed off the comforts and pity humans have to offer, you chose to get your fierce on and stand by your man

You've been scorned, mocked, beaten with words, and stabbed in the back by the very people you once had fellowship with.

You've felt a desperation few can withstand.

You've felt a desolation few can bear.

You have cried your pillow sopping wet far into the night, wondering if this pain in your heart would ever release it's choke hold on your throat. Or that hedge ball in your gut would someday travel up to your heart and there turn to stone.

You have wrung your hands, you have paced your floors, you have screamed at God, you have gotten angry at Him, maybe you have even packed your bags.

But when it came right down to it you knew deep in your soul that for you, leaving was wrong. For you, leaving was not an option. Deserting would only complicate matters, causing more pain, more desperation, more desolation.

Could you, dear woman, let that desperation drive you to the word of God? Could you let that desolation in your soul make you scramble in wild hope to the only place you dare look for it?

Your Jesus.

When you park your desperate self, right at His feet and you camp there till you are filled, encouraged, assured, and strengthened enough to take just one more step, you are well on your way to becoming a fierce woman.

At His feet you will be proven loved. Your wild hope proven right. Your cries heard. Your desperation eased. Your desolation salved.

If, there at His feet you are fully convinced that fighting for your man is the only option God wants you to pursue, be encouraged, dear wife! He will make you able. Maybe you cry out, “But its too hard. I don't even want to! Lord, give me some kind of want to!”

I wonder if He gently says, “I have given you a hope and a future. If you will chose the way I lead you, you will be supplied with blessings overflowing. I promise to fill you with strength and power. All you need to do is ask for it and I will supply.”

With that you drag yourself up. He has energized you and made you courageous. You are able to face that storm of scorn and look out at that sea of mocking faces.

You are human and you have a heart of flesh, so you will feel the pain when others turn their backs on you or treat you badly. But you hang on to your wild hope and fierce faith, braving the winds and gales of broken relationships. With your eyes set directly ahead on the promise of His prize you start nourishing the relationship He made in the likeness of Jesus and His Church. Your marriage.

Because you know, that you know, that you know, that your God is faithful and He will never bring you to destruction should you stay immovable and do as He has directed you.

So, dear desperate wife... you get your fierce on and you fight for your man.

You stand by him, fight alongside him, follow him wherever he leads your small band of a family. You praise and encourage his good works. You believe in his abilities to lead you, while covering him in fervent prayer. You forgive him when he is wrong and you forgive him first. You make his dreams your dreams. You make his home, your home. And you make his life, your life. >>TWEET THIS<<

Over time, you will emerge victorious. You will heal. Old pain will dim because the treasure you hold and keep building on far outshines it.

Over time, times change. Over time, people change. Over time, you've changed.

You've changed the story of generations to come, because you chose to wildly hope for a future. You chose to fiercely fight for your man. You chose to bravely hang on to what others deemed shameful. You chose to blindly, with eyes wide open in prayer, trust in your mans ability to lead, protect and provide for you.

All to disdain of people around you and to the horror of the enemy of your soul.

So, you get your fierce on, because no one can fight as hard for your man as a woman fully convicted that her God is able.

Her. (period, full stop) God. (period, full stop) is. (period, full stop) able. (whisper 'able')


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Friday, October 17, 2014

Faith Walk Interview with Kim from Pouring Down Like Rain

Today sweet Kim from Pouring Down Like Rain is sharing my interview of her ongoing Faith Walk series.

This was a bit scary for me! I don't know why. Maybe it's because getting my story, my 'stuff', out there is a bit foreign to me. However, I know many of you are intrigued by my roots. So I bared a little of my story to you.

I trust you will not find my answers conceited and selfish, but rather be encouraged and inspired to love the Lord as you are already doing, and then even more.

He is ever faithful, unchanging, capable of handling your junk, understanding you, caring for you and loving you in spite of it all. Quite capable, indeed.

Rest in that knowledge today.

Here is an excerpt of my interview. Be sure to click through to the link I have left at the bottom.

Was God always present in your life? Was it consistent?  I grew up Amish. We always went to church, Sunday school, summer Bible schools, and had daily prayer times in the morning and evening. So yes, the knowledge of God has always been present. 

At what age did you really understand and start to have a personal relationship with Him?  I was eleven when I accepted Jesus as my Savior. However, that wasn’t normal in the Amish culture. I kept this knowledge to myself.  The enemy attacked me brutally. He made me believe I  was alone, ridiculous & stupid. He made me feel like I was nothing short of a traitor to my family. I was scared out of my mind that if I told anyone of my salvation I would be mocked or misunderstood, but if I didn’t I was nothing short of a liar.

Did you have a pivotal circumstance that changed your path in life?  Yes. When I became pregnant with our oldest child. I was a scared teenager, far from my family and  unmarried.  Throw that into an Amish culture and you have all sorts of drama and issues. 

Click here to read the rest of my story. While you are there, please comment or follow Kim in some way. She has such a gentle loving spirit. I trust you will feel welcomed and loved at her little sanctuary where His grace is Pouring Down Like Rain.

Pouring Down Like Rain


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Monday, October 13, 2014

A Wife Driven to Desperation ~ Contribution to 31 Days to a Better Marriage

This post, in its entirety, is shared at Managing Your Blessings, where Carlie is hosting 31 Days to a Better Marriage challenge. 
This one was tough to write, because I have been that wife driven to desperation. Desperate for better, desperate for healing, discouraged, depressed, angry and bitter, ready to run. By God's mercy and grace I found myself driven to His feet, where He ministered to me lovingly and gently. Many times I didn't like who or what He wanted to change, but allowing Him to do so has been life changing for me and life breathing to my marriage.
Here is an excerpt. Be sure to click through to read ways found in God's word for a wife to grow and flourish in her role.
Many wives are dissatisfied, discouraged, angry, depressed, lost . . . searching, simply waiting out their existence. Misled and desperate.
Desperate for change, fulfillment, love . . . something.
So they turn to things. Another man. An addiction. A secret life. A pit.
A deep, dark, desperate pit.
Are you in that pit? All alone? Ready for change, but still going back to it because that’s where you’re safe? Because hoping for change is harder than pretending it can’t happen? Because protecting your heart is less painful than opening it enough for healing to happen?
31 Days to a Better Marriage
Click here read the rest of this article at Managing Your Blessings, where Carlie is hosting 31 Days to a Better Marriage challenge. There you will find  many other encouraging articles for wives in need of encouragement. 
Christian Marriage Bloggers
You are loved, dear daughter of Christ! Blessings!

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Wednesday, October 8, 2014

What God Says When We Feel Annoyed

"A fool shows his annoyance at once, 
but a prudent man overlooks an insult." 
~ Proverbs 12:16 ~

"saith the LORD of hosts; 
therefore take heed to your spirit, 
that ye deal not treacherously." 
~ Malachi 2:16 ~ KJV

"Therefore, as God's chosen people,
 holy and dearly loved, 
clothe yourselves with compassion, 
kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 
Bear with one another 
and forgive whatever grievances 
you may have against one another...." 
~ Colossians 3:12-13 ~

"Be completely humble and gentle; 
be patient, bearing with one another in love." 
~ Ephesians 4:2 ~

"be clear minded and self-controlled 
so that you can pray." 
~ 1 Peter 4:7 ~

"be temperate, 
worthy of respect, 
and sound in faith, 
in love and in endurance." 
~ Titus 2:2 ~

Sometimes the encouragement we need has to come straight from God's word for it to really speak to our hearts. While adding our own words can be helpful and encouraging, there are times when reading another's thoughts just adds to the noise in our head. 

I believe this happens because what we really need is for our Creator's voice to speak directly into our hearts. We need Him. He is the only one who can fill that God-shaped hole in our heart. 

His word is all powerful, all healing and wholly dependable.

Mine aren't.

This is part of a long series of posts focused directly on what God says when we feel or need a certain thing. 

Just His word. 

Just for you. 

Read them. Pray them. Write them. Add a few of your favorites. I trust however you use them, He will provide what you need. 



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Monday, October 6, 2014

Don't Judge Me Because I Sin Differently Than You and Why You Shouldn't Be Saying This

When I first read this quote, I smiled. It was on Facebook, and I know I “liked” it. It made me feel good.

Then it became vile tasting. Somehow it lost it's flavor and authenticity and I was left with a lingering uneasiness about it.

Telling people to not judge me because I sin differently than they do, might make me feel better about not using the whole overused “judge not” line. But in actuality, its saying “I know I sin, but I like my sin, so I'm going to keep doing my sin, because my sin makes me feel good. If anyone dares point it out, I'm going to be Christian enough to admit it. But I'm not going to be Christ-like in my attitude in addressing it. I'm going to make myself feel better by pointing out theirs.”

I want to do what I want to do, because I want to do it, how I want to do it, when I want to do it, why I want to do it, because I am I and I need to feel good about I. that again...

Sure, it makes people back off because I'm pleading my case. But, in actuality I'm just saying their sin makes my sin OK. 

Their sin makes my sin tolerable. 

Their sin makes my sin less sinful. 

Their sin makes my sin in less need of repenting of.

That's wrong. It holds about as much weight in God's book as does a feather providing a windbreak in a blizzard.

Yes, you and I are loved by God more than we'll ever know, and are covered in more grace than we'll ever need. But, we should never assume that because of His love and grace, we needn't confess and repent of our sin. If we have knowledge of sin in our life, we are responsible for repenting of it, not justifying it.

What are your thoughts on this?


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10 Biblical Resources for Christian Women ~ Blog Swap with Michele Lesley

Questions. As Christian women, we’ve all got them: “How can I grow in my walk with the Lord?” “Where can I get some good advice on being a more godly wife?” “What’s a great resource for biblical parenting?” These days, it can be hard to know where to turn for great answers that are also biblically sound. Here are ten biblical resources to get you started.

Go HERE or click below to see the 10 Bookmarkable Biblical Resources.

Bookmarkable Biblical Resources

Today I participate in another blog swap with Michele Lesley. I appreciate this list of resources she has put together, and use many of them myself. I trust you will find them helpful!

If you are a blogger, please click below to read more about Michele's Blog Swap.

Monday, September 29, 2014

Anemic Women of the Christian Faith

Update: Many readers have found this post harsh. I can understand this. Please know, I consider this for myself first. We must take the Lord's word in it's entirety. While his love and grace cover all our sins, neither does He expect us to stay in our elementary knowledge of Him. We are to grow and mature. In order to do so we must take the saltiness of His word with the sweetness. If we do not, we are in danger of no longer being the salt of His earth.

You are dear to me. The reason I wrote these words is because they have me written all over them. I tend to be most firm on subjects that I see myself in. Please read the comments and add your thoughts. Blessings!

Today's Christianity rarely sees women worthy of being praised.

Oh, they get it all right. 

They get praised for getting their sweet, darling little selves to church on time with the whole family in coordinating outfits. They are praised for participating in Bible studies, teaching Sunday school, or any other thing that people see and deem good.

Nothing wrong with that. Part of every woman wants to know her efforts are appreciated.

But, most Christian women have been pumped so full on this sugary sweet, foo-foo-ey type praise, they've started believing that soaking up and gushing out praises coated with syrup in high pitched tones for no reason other than showing her face, is normal.

As a result, they get their heads stuck so far up in the clouds, feeding on marshmallows of “you're just so precious!” and bon-bons of “how sweet and darling can you be?!” type of stuff, that they've become anemic in their faith.

They've become weak. Not just weak, but weak-willed as well. They have no backbone when it comes to their faith. They've become wishy-washy, lackluster. They exude feeble character. They buckle and fall apart like a dandelion head at the first poof of wind.

They've become ineffectual, ill-equipped to cope with any situation that might mean standing firm in their faith. Not only are they ill-equipped, they've become flat out insipid, lacking an interest in growing the faith they do have. They just like knowing everything is sweet and lovely and kind and generous They have no conviction, no desire, no hunger for the one true God.

They just sit there on their fine little fanny growing more and more anemic with each passing day.

If you're that kind of woman, I'll tell you what I told thousands of women here: It's time you grow up. It's time you open that word of God and start getting a feel for what is real. You start feeding and feasting on God's unending buffet, complete with free refills of His living water. Then you order up yourself a good dose of “test me, Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind” (Psalm 26:2) and you pray for the courage to live in full reliance on His faithfulness.

For now, we are going to look at examples of women who are not anemic. Exceptional women who are worthy of being praised. Exceptional women just doing every day life in every day ways.

  1. The mom who bravely submits to homeschooling her children when it would be so much easier to send them to school.
  2. The wife who works long hard hours beside her husband establishing their family business.
  1. The mother up all night holding her child through a sickness.
  1. The mother who sits beside her child's hospital bed, day in and day out.
  1. The grandmother raising her grandchildren.
  1. The teenage girl who chooses to keep her child.
  1. The wife who bravely forsakes her family, friends and all things familiar to follow her husband and his vision, which he is fully persuaded holds much more promise than that of staying where they are.
  1. The widow or single mom raising up little ones to be mighty arrows.
  1. The wife who forgives her husband's infidelity the first time...the second time...the third time...
  2. The mother who buried her child before his or her time.
  3. The missionary wife and mother. 
  4. The chronically ill woman.
  5. Think of that one woman you would name far from having an anemic faith. Put her name here_______.

What makes her exceptional?

Is it the circumstances placed upon her? Maybe she's still young, so could it be her vitality? Maybe she's experienced a lot in life? Or maybe she hasn't been knocked down quite as many times? Maybe its just her personality, you think?

Or maybe she's an exceptional woman because she nurtures a not so anemic faith.

She's not afraid of taking a stand for the right.
She's not afraid of getting her hands dirty, stained and calloused.
She's not afraid of being tired.
She's not afraid of being lonely.
She's not afraid of doing more than her share.
She's not afraid of what people say.

She just knows right here and right now, in her present situation, she has a God who sustains her. She has a God who promises a hope and a future to the faithful. And she has set her mind to being faithful till her very last breath.

She knows her God is far from anemic Himself, and because He made her in His likeness she can stand tall and strong, laughing at the days to come. Laughing at whatever breeze or gale may come storming her way. She doesn't run in fear or cower under the enemy's threats like women with an anemic faith do.

She bravely calls for her God. He answers her and He makes her bold. Then He finishes with a flourish, dousing her with an ample supply of stoutheartedness.

She digs in and does what needs to be done to the amazement of those around her. Some laugh at her. Some scorn. Some betray. Many wonder, certain she has fallen off her rocker or will be falling soon.

Yet, she stands tall and strong. She squares her shoulders, bravely marching on with her sword of truth and sheild of faith, head held high and her eyes glued to the prize He holds for His exceptional, stouthearted women of the faith.

Listen, she's not exceptional because she's not scared. She's probably scared out of her mind.

She's exceptional because she is not anemic. She's not complacent. She's not weak.

She's exceptional because she's far from being anemic in her faith.  >>tweet this<<

"So, because you are lukewarm-
neither hot nor cold-
I am about to spit you out of my mouth."
~ Revelation 3:16 ~


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