Monday, September 1, 2014

Verses for When You Feel Alone

Sometimes the encouragement we need has to come straight from God's word for it to really speak to our hearts. While adding our own words can be helpful and encouraging, there are times when reading another's thoughts just adds to the noise in our head. 

I believe this happens because what we really need is for our Creator's voice to speak directly into our hearts. We need Him. He is the only one who can fill that God-shaped hole in our heart. 

His word is all powerful, all healing and wholly dependable.

Mine aren't.

So, this is the beginning of a long series of posts focused directly on what God says when we feel or need a certain thing. 

Just His word. 

Just for you. 

Read them. Pray them. Write them. Add a few of your favorites. I trust however you use them, He will provide what you need. 

Always.






"Come near to God and He will come near to you..." 
~ James 4:8 ~


"I will not leave you comfortless: 
I will come to you." 
 ~ John 14:18 ~ KJV


"God is your refuge and strength, 
a very present help in trouble. "
 ~ Psalm 46:1 ~


"For the sake of His great name 
the Lord will not reject His people, 
because the Lord was pleased to make you his own. "
 ~ 1 Samuel 12:22 ~

Did you read that? God says He is PLEASED to make you His very own!


"The Lord Himself goes before you
 and will be with you; 
He will never leave you nor forsake you. 
Do not be afraid; 
do not be discouraged. "
 ~ Deuteronomy 31:8 ~


"Cast all your anxiety on Him 
because He cares for you.
 ~ 1 Peter 5:7 ~


"neither death nor life, 
neither angels nor demons, 
neither the present nor the future, 
nor any powers, 
neither height nor depth, 
nor anything else in all creation, 
will be able to separate us from the love of God 
that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
 ~ Romans 8:38-39


Jesus said, 
“I am with you always, 
to the very end of the age.” 
 ~ Matthew 28:20 ~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Friday, August 29, 2014

No Date Nights Allowed and What One Wife Did About It

I love quality time. Thrive on it, in fact.

I'd love a monthly date night with my husband.

But he doesn't. In fact, he's a self proclaimed “I-don't-date-my-wife”-er.




There came the day when I realized I had two options in this layout. I could get all “poor me” about it, thinking things like “he doesn't love me” or “he doesn't find me worth his time” and all the other things us women are prone to think.

OR, I could put on my big girl undies, and realize he loves me in ways only he can love me, and if that means one date night in six years, then that means one date night in six years. 

That one wasn't so grand and romantic anyway, considering the lady at the table next to us had a heart attack. That'll put a damper on just about anything.

Back to my two options.

If you've been a woman for any amount of time, you already know I went through option one.

It wasn't ideal.

I felt horrible for “not being enough”. My attitude made him feel horrible for not being a romantic prince charming who turns zucchini into Lamborghini, and whisks me off into the sunset.

Like I said, it just wasn't ideal.

So, I chose to hitch up those big girl undies, and find other ways to indulge my need. This is what I did.

I spent 6 hours preparing a rack of ribs, mashed potatoes and gravy, dressing, salad, homemade buns with strawberry jam...the whole nine yards. There was ice cream, cherry pie and coffee for dessert. I got out the fine china, not touched since our wedding, my most prized tablecloth, and the wine glasses to serve a delectable punch.

I added a pair of long stem candles and bam! all was set.

Our two kids were put to bed early, and I expected a grand evening with my number one.

The timer went off. All was ready to present to my husband. I was prepared to blow his socks off!

One glitch. The oven had decided to take on a mind of it's own some time back, and was baking at half the desired temperature. The ribs wouldn't be ready for another 2 hours and it was already 8pm.

I was devastated. Totally deflated.

What a flop!

I had a hungry man on my hands and all he wanted was food.

So, we ate.

In candle light. On fine china. Without the ribs. In awkward silence.

My husband somehow found the humor in all this and smiled. It was a teensy little smile, which he tried to disguise by taking another bite, but I saw it.

How dare he smile!

I couldn't hold back the tears any longer.

They spilled onto my napkin in silence.

We continued eating in silence.

He smiled some more.

In silence.

Now, please understand, it wasn't a mean smile. It was a gentle “It's OK, hun.” kind of smile.

But to me, he still smiled and this was no smiling matter.

Oh! In case you're wondering about his socks....they stayed on his feet.

We went to bed. He held me quietly while I cried some more. Every once on a while I could feel him smile again. 

And I'd cry a few more tears. 



Fast forward to the next evening.

In an effort to make up for the night before, I served his favorite meal: homemade pizza with cookies-n-cream ice cream.

As I was preparing the meal, which, by the way, took a measly 1 hour compared to last nights 6, I saw those long stem candles.

They seemed to mock me, daring me try it again.

So, as not to admit defeat, I did.

I got out the china. Set four places instead of two.

I got out the beautiful table cloth and the wine glasses. The leftover punch didn't have anymore fizz in it, but I decided to serve it anyway.

He came home on time, 10 minutes before the pizza was done. Just long enough for him to cuddle his giggling 1 & 2 year old daughters.

Then we ate our dinner.

His favorite meal. In candlelight. The sun streaming through the window. We sipped our fizz-less punch, the kids jabbering in excitement, trying to blow out the candles.

Punch got spilled from sippy cups, pizza sauce and ice cream got smeared across hands, faces and tablecloth, someone choked on meat and the other tipped a candle into the pizza.

Again, my husband got fed. Again, his socks stayed on. Again, he smiled.

And it was OK for him to do that this time.

Because THIS TIME held the quality I was looking for.



Since then, every time I'm needing a little quality time we have a pizza in candlelight dinner with the whole family.

Every single time, he smiles.

Every single time, so do I.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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Thursday, August 21, 2014

Speaking Your Approval






You love your husband.

You know it, he knows it, your kids know it, your friends and family know it....

But, sometimes in the day to day ruts of routine, you just take it for granted that everybody knows. I mean, you're still here with him! So, that should be proof enough that you love him, honor him, respect him....all the good wife stuff, right?

WRONG.

He kinda needs to hear you say it. A man likes that kind of thing. He won't ask for it. He might not even know he craves your approval.

But, he does.

And, one thing he does know is that when you praise him, life seems a bit more do-able. Things look just a bit easier. He likes that feeling; that feeling of acceptance.

You should be the one making him feel that way.

So, today pick one of the following phrases, and drop it on him just because he's your man.

Note, "just because he's your man". 

That should be enough for him to deserve a kind word.

Pick one! Say it! Mean it! Do it again!


#1. It will be OK.

This tells him you share the load of whatever life has brought.

That pile of bills. That unexpected vehicle expense. That medical emergency or health issue...whatever it is, it will be OK. You're there for him.

If the issue is self inflicted... it's still OK. He's probably embarrassed enough at his mistake. He doesn't need you to take a jab at him.

This will tell him you're still on his team. You'll get through this together, and be stronger because of it.


"An anxious heart weighs a man down,
but a kind word cheers him up."
~ Proverbs 12:25 ~



#2. Thank you for your hard work.

You like being appreciated. So does he. Part of a mans physique is to provide and protect. Carrying this burden then adding an unappreciative wife is like pouring salt on a wound. Thank him for his efforts and watch his morale be boosted enough to last a whole week or more. He might even be moved to finish that landscaping project he started a year ago!

This verse made me smile a few days ago.

"Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love,
all the days of your meaningless life
that God has given you under the sun-
For this is your lot in life
and in your toilsome labor under the sun."
~Ecclesiastes 9:9~

Make it easy for him to enjoy his "lot" of loving you, providing for you and protecting you by speaking you're approval of his "toilsome labor".


#3. Thank you for loving me.

Let's get it straight...you're not always the easiest cactus to love on.

This tells him that you think he's pretty awesome to still find you lovable. It also tells him he's doing it right. He makes your heart happy.


#4. I'm proud of you.

Well....aren't you? If not, you should be.

He likes knowing you approve of him- that you accept his flaws with his perfections. While the rest of the world will pounce on his first wrong move or tear him up about past mistakes, with you, he is approved of and appreciated. His heart can safely trust in you. A man finds much peace and rest in that knowledge.

So go tell him you're proud of him, just the way he is.

Because he's your man. >>TWEET THIS<<


Which one are you going to speak to your husband today? Or, share what you tell your husband to encourage him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Be inspired!

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Monday, August 18, 2014

It's a Good Day to be a Mom



cereal meets floor
toilet overflows
toothpaste on the mirror

...it's a good day to be a mom.

pickle soaked carpet
applesauce on ceiling
raw eggs thrown

...it's a good day to be a mom.

splashing in puddles
mud matted hair
worms named Fred

...it's a good day to be a mom.

toasted cheese
mac-n-cheese
goldfish made of cheese

...it's a good day to be a mom.

cake batter dumped
gum in her hair
writing on the wall

...it's a good day to be a mom.

boo-boo's kissed
boogers wiped
showered in sneezes

...it's a good day to be a mom.

vomit on the stairs
pee in the tub
sweet slobbery kisses

...it's a good day to be a mom.

nap time
cuddle time
bed times

…it's a good day to be a mom.

swimming lessons
math lessons
life lessons

…it's a good day to be a mom.


hand holder
heart soother
fear chaser

...it's a good day to be a mom.

best friend
greatest coach
constant cheerleader

...it's a good day to be a mom.

happy times
tearful times
stressful times

...it's a good day to be a mom.

yesterday
still today
every day

you got it...

...it's a good day to be a mom. >>tweet this<<






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Friday, August 15, 2014

Five Minute Friday: Tell Me



Tell me of your greatest pain - I will tell you of my healing.
Tell me of your greatest fear - I will tell you of my care.
Tell me of your anxious soul - I will tell you of my kindness.
Tell me of your weary load - I will carry it for you.
Tell me of your greatest sorrow - comfort is what I offer.
Tell me of your saddened heart - I will tell you of my joy.
Tell me of your greatest sin - I will tell you "your forgiven!"
Tell me of your darkest night - I will tell you of my light.
Tell me of your weakest moment - I will make you strong.
Tell me of your falling down - I will raise you up.
Tell me or your riches - I will tell you of treasures unknown.
Tell me of your burdened soul - I will give you rest.
Tell me of your loneliness - I will be your friend.

Love, Jesus


Joining Kate Motaung and the Five Minute Friday community!

She decides on a word prompt.

Everyone writes for just FIVE minutes.

We post. We read. We love it!!!




Sharing with... Missional Call, Essential Things, Missional Women, Christian Mommy Blogger, A look at The Book, Nancherrow, Create With Joy, Counting My Blessings, My Freshly Brewed Life, Renewed Daily, Sandra Heska king, Faith Along The Way, Lisha Epperson, Janis Cox, Managing Your Blessings, Chronicles of Grace, The Beauty in His Grip, The Wellspring, She Lives Free, Soul Survivor 3d Lessons fro Life, Nancherrow, Missional Call,

Saturday, August 9, 2014

Women's Ministry Derailed

Do you ever think or say things like.....

I want to impact lives.
I need to get more involved in the church, so I can do more good.
I feel like everyone else is doing more, and here I am, doing nothing.
I want to "get out there".

If so, I get that.

Maybe you're a mom, too.

While you're changing diapers, your friend is changing lives.
While you're wiping boogers, another is wiping away tears.
While you're feeding mouths, still another is feeding souls.

Everyone else seems to be hollering "all  aboard" the salvation train, then racing off into the sunset, so to speak, and you? You barely make it to nap time without derailing.

I get that.

The derailing part is my every day. For real.






Dear mom with no ministry,  You already have one.

It's staring you in the face.
It's that dull noise around you.
Maybe it's sitting on top of you right now:

your child.

The day your oldest was born, you stepped into full time ministry. Your child is who you'll impact the most for the rest of your life. The one who needs you most, wants you most, deserves you most.

Life changing ministry that involves "getting out there" is a glorious calling. But a selfish one, if it neglects the ones set in your life right now. 

You see, changing lives is rarely in the "getting out there". Rather its in the day to day. One step at a time. Maybe making it to nap time in one piece. Getting everyone dressed for the day; speaking and being the kindness your children thrive on.

Don't fall for the trap of  "I have no impact".

The greatest calling you'll ever have is touching the lives of those little ones tugging at you. Those tugs on your clothes should have the greatest tug on your soul. 

Your "right here" and your "right now" is exactly where you're supposed to be. Live in it. >>tweet this<<


Be their mom,
their cheerleader,
their trusted confidant.

Your greatest calling.
Your everyday.
Your ministry.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Be encouraged!
Be inspired!

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Sharing with.... Renewed Daily, Sandra Heska King, Oh my Heartsie Girl, Lisha Epperson, Janis Cox, Managing My Blessings, A Proverbs 31 Wife, Moms the Word, Create with Joy, Life of Faith, Enchanted Homeschooling Mom, What Joy is Mine, The Modest Mom, A Mamas Story, Yes They are all Ours, She Lives Free, Cornerstone Confessions, The Time-Warp Wife, , Teaching What is Good, Rich Faith Rising, Diamonds in the Rough, Juana Mikels, Simply Beth, A soft Gentle Voice, Joy Dare, Raising Homemakers, Wise Woman Builds Her House, My Daily Walk In His Grace, Holley Gerth, Woman2Woman, Messy Marriage, Wake up Wednesday, Rachel Wojnarowski, So Much at Home, Whole Hearted Home, What You Wish Wednesdays, Saving 4 Six, Children are a Blessing, Serving Joyfully, 3d Lessons 4 life, Jennifer Dukes Lee, M,M&M, God's Girl, Graced Simplicity, Jenni Mullinix, Imparting Grace, Eat Sleep Be, Creative K Kids, 7 Days Time, Missional Call, Essential Things, Missional Women, Christian Mommy Blogger, A Look at the Book, Nancherrow, Family Fun Friday, Create with Joy, Counting My Blessings, My Freshly Brewed Life, Faith Along The Way, Holley Gerth, Messy Marriage, Merideth Bernard, Simple Moments Stick

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Monday, July 28, 2014

Get to Know Me Blog Hop


Well. The first thoughts I have about the image above is... "That sounds a bit self-centered." Ugh.

Let me explain.

I was invited by Katie Reid to participate in a writer's blog hop, where I'll answer 4 questions about my writings (always the same four questions). Then by introducing  3 of my blogger friends, I "pass the baton" to them and they answer the questions. I couldn't find 3 bloggers who wanted to participate, because they had already done it, were doing it soon, or were too busy to do it now. So, I will introduce 3 of my blogging friends without expecting them to answer the questions again.



Here goes.....my answers to the 4 questions....

1. What am I writing or working on?

I just got done with a 40 day prayer challenge for wives. Right now I'm in a bit of a dry season when it comes to writing. I have all these thoughts and great inspirations, but somehow getting them on paper isn't working so well. At first I felt bad. Almost guilty.

Then panic set in. If you're a blogger you get that. Thoughts like "what if I lose all my readers?" "What will they think?" That lasted for maybe 1 minute, because the fact is,

I need to take a blogging break. Maybe just a slow down.

The #1 reason I haven't felt led to share many of my writings is because I need to focus more on my first ministry: my marriage, my family, my home. I haven't actually been neglecting them...blogging has always been second to all that. But, what blogging does do is take time, energy and a lot of emotion. I need a blogging break and He has finally given me the OK to take it!

However, I won't stop writing because the second reason I need to slow down is because I have felt convicted to focus more on writing a book. Will it happen soon? Nope! Will it happen in a year...maybe. Maybe not. I don't know. While I am excited about all this, you probably don't need to get your hopes up! Nevertheless, that is what I'm working on long term.

To all my blogger and writing friends, if you have published a book, PLEASE share which publishing company you chose or if you chose the self-publishing route and why? This little Amish girl is quite lost in this world of techy-talk. Any advice would be appreciated!



2. How does my writing differ from others in its genre?

I have no idea. Is that an answer?

There aren't many blogs whose greatest focus is on a wife's character and role.

Maybe mine is different because I'm a teacher at heart. Most of what I've written doesn't have a personal testimony or story line approach. But, most of what I've shared has an educational aspect, practical wisdom and biblical approach. I like diving into His word, so what I share must be backed up and proven by it.



3. Why do I write what I do?

This one is easy...

Because I have to!!!

You don't understand that, do you?

See, I scorned writing, speaking and blogging until about 10 months ago, when God once again convicted me that I am to be involved in women's ministry. I say "again" because when He first tried, I gave Him a flat out "no". I said something like this, "Go find someone else. You've got the wrong Kaylene in mind. Nope, not doing it."

....can anyone relate? Or is it just me?! ugh.

That was 3 1/2 to 4 years ago. All that time, I couldn't ignore Him, and I couldn't run away.

When I finally said "yes, Lord," I also tacked on "but don't make me speak and don't make me write."

... I wonder if you're smiling because you know what's coming...

Now I write, and have had the honor of holding my first speaking engagement.

I love both.

Why? Because it's all His plan.

I write what I do because when I obediently pick up a pen and start writing, His words fill the page. 


4. How does my writing process work?

Uummm... I'm drawing a blank again.

I don't have a process.

Furthermore, I didn't know I needed one!

I just write....I write when it's hard. I write when is easy. I write when its a joy. I write through the tears. I write when its a sacrifice. I write as an offering.

As close to a process that I can think of is, I usually write in the morning before my family wakes, or during my children's nap times/quiet times, so maybe that's a process?

I don't know....I just know that for now, I'm supposed to write. 

So I do.

Well, I've answered all the questions on the list. I must say this is one of the more personal posts I've shared. It feels good to share a little of my story, my feelings, maybe even a little of my spunk? (smile)


There are many of you who have asked questions or would like to ask questions about me. Some have, others aren't sure it's OK to ask.

So, to this post, I will also add a few questions I get asked about myself and my blog, ALL THE TIME.


1. Why don't you write about the Amish? This mostly comes from ex-Amish people, so this answer is directed toward that crowd.

Because that's not what He wants. Moreover, I refuse to write about past wrongs or dig up old bones when His word tells us to "forgive as He forgives" (Matt6) and to "strain toward what is ahead, pressing on toward the goal" (Phil3). How much heavenly 'goal reaching' are we going to do if we keep dwelling in the past?

Proverbs 17:9 says "He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends." (NIV) Other translations say "one who dwells on disputes will alienate a friend" (NRS) "gossiping about the sin breaks up friendships" (NCV) "he who keeps talking of a thing makes division between friends" (BBE). Personally, I don't want to be around people who are always bad mouthing others. It's exhausting. It's angering. It causes dissension, one of the 7 abominations. (Proverbs 6)

So, no, you will not find any Amish bashing on this blog. EVER. I lost a lot of readers when this was discovered. How sad. But, neither do I care. I don't need that negative energy.

I prefer to learn and grow from hurts and wrongs, not dwell in them. Doesn't mean I don't still feel them. Doesn't mean I don't know how you feel. But, it does mean, if you want to get fired up about hurts in your past then you'll need to take yourself to an actual Amish hate blog. They can be found.

Strong words? Yes. Facts are tough sometimes.


2. Is your writing affected by your heritage? This comes from non-Amish.

I used to think, no. But, I've come to accept that yes, my writing is affected by my heritage. Amish is who I was for 22 years. You can't live that much life rooted in a setting and not be largely affected by it, whether positively or negatively. Many of the values or principles found in my writings, I learned through my parents, family, and the quiet, slower pace the Amish life brings.

3. Do I miss it? This comes from both ex-Amish and non-Amish, and always feels like a trick question!

Amish culture? No.

Quiet life? Yes.

Can a quiet Christian life be established without the Amish setting? Yes. And we try, because that's what we love. Simple is better. Relaxed is rejuvenating. Quiet is sane. Slower goes too fast. I can't imagine making what goes so fast, go even faster by adding an excessive amount of going or an over abundance of doing.

Do you have a burning question you'd like to ask me? Go ahead and ask in the comments below! I'd love to hear from you!



Now I will introduce my 3 friends. These ladies have been a pleasure to get to know through the world of blogs. I hope you hop over and read a few of their writings. You will be blessed!

Introducing Katie:
Picture

Katie Reid is a recovering perfectionist, who is learning to slow down and breathe deeply, as she fumbles to receive and extend grace in the everyday moments. She delights in her hubby and four children and their life in ministry. Studying God's Word, singing/songwriting, blogging, photography, and heartfelt conversations are a few of her favorite things. She blogs at Echoes of My Heart and also has an album by the same name on Amazon. She'd love to connect with you on Facebook and Twitter.

I met Katie through her #inspireandgrow link-up party. We have further found common ground in that she lives among an Amish community. Here she has shared a few things she has observed from 'across the fence'. I love the honesty and heart in her writings. I love her energy! There's never a boring moment when reading her blog.



This is Laura:
Laura Connell head shot
Laura shares, “God’s Girl is my love letter to Jesus. The goal is for the blog to be a place where women gather to grow in confidence and walk in freedom through knowledge of the Word and a deepening relationship with Christ.
Through the truth of Scripture I have been healed of many addictions and hang-ups including body image issues, alcoholism, post-abortion trauma, anger, and people-pleasing.
I believe God speaks to each of us individually through the verses of Scripture according to our spiritual needs. He meets us there and teaches us to grow and change so we can walk in the freedom His Son bought for us with His blood.”
You can find Laura Connell at: God’s Girl – Growing together through Christ.
I met Laura through her weekly link-up party. She was so sweet as to further share the blog post I shared there. Her presence and faithful readership of my blog ramblings is very appreciated. Her writings breathe of her gentle healing spirit. Truly a blessing to get to know. I hope you take a moment to visit her.


This is my sweet friend Beth:


Beth Stiff is Simply Beth, at least that’s what her blog is called. A wife to her Army Reserve husband and a mom of two boys, with her oldest son serving in the Navy, and a mother-in-law too. She a Jesus lover, a family gal who loves her friends, and reading with a hot cup of coffee. Her life is changed, even after 20 years of marriage with a love that grows stronger. But the bottom line, is in the heart. Beth loves the heart things and to speak about the Love that changed her and keeps changing her. She’s an encourager who thrives on being in our corner. You can also find her over here, bloggingTwitteringFacebooking, and posting pictures to the Pinterest world.
I have no idea how I met Beth. Maybe through her weekly Three Word Wednesday Link-up?? Maybe through a comment she left on my blog? How ever we met, she has turned into a very dear friend. She was my first "blogger friend". The one who reached out and made me feel welcome and heard in this crazy blogging world. This is nothing new. That's just what Beth does; she cares. Just a sweet, sweet lady, loved by many. I am beyond honored to introduce her to you.


Remember that book publishing advice you had? Yeah. I need that.
What about that burning question you wanted to ask? 
Now would be a good time to ask it! Please use the comment section below.


I might be sharing with these wonderful blogs.